


Control.

by Brokenanathema



Category: Panic! at the Disco, Phandom, Twenty One Pilots, the 1975 - Fandom
Genre: Borderline Personality Disorder, Depression, Halsey - Freeform, M/M, Psychosis, Realistic representation of mental illness, Self Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, psych unit, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-04-23
Packaged: 2018-09-24 06:16:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 9,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9707141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brokenanathema/pseuds/Brokenanathema
Summary: Tyler plummets head-first into a mania episode with psychosis.Joshua has borderline personality disorder and an rainbow of anxiety disorders.They are both sectioned.Shits about to hit the pan.(Inspired by Halseys wonderful song "control")





	1. Tyler.

**Author's Note:**

> Tyler is 18  
> Zack is 16  
> Jay is 8  
> And Madison is 12 
> 
> Please don't read if your easily triggered

"They are all going to kill you"

Tyler heard him, blurry was defiantly there.

The voice made him jump, he accidentally knocked his food of the table startling his confused family.

"Did you hear that?" Tyler practically shouted, as his family glared at him, "Or are you on his team?"

"He's getting bad again" Jay mumbled to his sister.

"Tyler why don't you go to the basement honey" Kelly suggested softly.

Tyler shoot her a suspicious glance,

"Why?"

"Because it's safe down there"

Tyler hesitated.

"You're on my side?"

"Of course"

Tyler usually enjoyed the warmth of the basement, but right now it had never felt colder. 

He plonked himself on the second hand sofa that sat in the middle of the room. 

The walls came alive. 

Shadows danced against the walls, all marked with blood red eyes. 

Tyler gasped, but he couldn't move. 

Blurrys minions where here, and they where going to kill him. 

"Write" One of the shadows commanded. 

Tyler grabbed his notebook and pen and wrote.

\----------------

"What are we going to do?" Kelly paced the dining room. 

"Finish lunch and then we could call the crisis team?" Zack suggested.

"I agree with zack, he agreed to go to the basement, that's an improvement" added Chris. 

"FUCK KNOWS WHAT HE'S DOING IN THE GODDAMN BASEMENT"

Jay and maddy jumped at their mums outburst.

"I'll check" Maddy said calmly, excusing her self from the table,

"Wait, I'll go with you" said Zack, knowing that there wasn't any point of talking her out of it, Maddy was nearly as stubborn as Tyler. 

The opened the door and snuck down the stairs, there was paper everywhere.

Sheets spread about like confetti, each covered in writing. 

"Wow"

"Tyler" 

"Tyler"

"TYLER"

Zack failed to get his attention, it was like nothing else existed accept from his pen and paper. 

Maddy sighed and the two siblings went upstairs.

\------------

Tyler had been writing for 4 hours now. 

"Stop" a dark, heart-stopping voice demanded. 

Tyler obeyed, dropping his pencil. 

Blurryface, with the red-eyed shadows glared at him. 

"Mum said your not real" 

"Oh trust me Tyler, I'm more real than you'll ever be" 

Blurry stepped forward.

"I know you want to die but I also know that the way I plan to kill you is your biggest fear" blurry smiled, "you wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of me now, would you Tyler boy?"

Tyler stood frozen in fear.

"Would you?" 

"No" Tyler whimpered

"I can't hear you" Blurry said, slowly pulling out a knife. 

"No" Tyler sobbed loudly.

"Make me proud" Blurry pointed at Tylers secret stash of blades.


	2. Josh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING

This isn't real. 

Josh feels like he's been living in a dazed nightmare; for the past 6 fucking weeks.

He was ready to go now. 

Everyday he asked himself "is this a good day to kill myself" and "should I hold on for one more day" 

One more day for what? To be the crazy kid? Just to be the neighbour hood freak?

Josh had was done. 

It was time to say goodbye.

Time to go to the real world. 

He looked his bathroom door, his mom usually came home around 6 and it was currently 3 so she would be to late to save him. 

He felt guilty, Josh was far to attached to his mother than most 18 year old boy but he was doing this for her own good. 

He sat in the bath, fully dressed of course, and let the taps run. 

He sat completely idle, with silent tears colliding with the tap water.

He stayed like that for a while, his limbs felt to heavy to move. 

The packets of pills were sat on the side, almost mocking him as he wept, he grabbed them popping open 35 paracetemols and swallowing them all in 5 goes, then he grabs his blades, making slit after slit after slit. New red added to the pallet of colours that had already stained his arms and thighs. 

This way he could not fail. 

He could NOT fail.

The water was a sickly red colour.

"Josh"

"Josh"

Josh made the voice out to be his sister 

"Oh fuck" mumbled.

He was slipping away.

"M'fine" he yelled, but his voice was week.

"What are you doing?" Ashley asked,

Josh tried to reply but he was to weak to speak. 

"Josh"

"Josh"

"JOSH" Ashley was panicking now, "JORDEN GET YOUR ASS HERE"

"What the fuck Ash?"

"JOSH!" 

" oh no not again" the colour drained from Jordan's face " JOSH LET US IN" 

Jordan smashed the the door open. 

"Oh my god" 

Josh was covered in his whole sick and soaked in bloody water. 

Ashley threw up. 

Jordan cried, "call 911" he yelled to his sister.

Ashley obeyed and Jorden shook his brother. 

"Come on Josh" Josh cried, tears racing down his face. He took off his t shirt and wrapped around Joshs arm. 

"Their on their way" Ashley said, swallowing sick as she ran over to josh. 

She slapped him trying to wake him up. 

He opened his heavy eyelids, desperately looking at his siblings. 

Ashley and Jordan felt there hearts break. 

Then Josh was taken by sleep.


	3. Tyler.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another trigger warning my frens |-/

Blurry was silent. 

The shadows were faded. 

Tyler wanted to kill himself.

It wouldn't be long until blurry returned anyway. 

Tyler couldn't see the the point of carrying on, everyday was the same. 

This isn't living. 

He used some left over baby wipes to wipe the blood off his hands and swapped jeans. 

"You're alone" said blurry, but his voice was tired and easier to ignore. 

Tyler was done with fighting every single fucking day.

He pulled a hoody on to cover his ruby red arms and clambered up the basement stairs. 

"Oh Tyler, are you feeling better" cheered his mum, in a painfully fake voice. 

"Go away" Tyler grumbled,

Grabbing some soda from the fridge, his arm killing as he stretched.

He could feel his family stares. 

"Do not speak to your mother like that" 

Tyler ignored his farther. 

"Tyler" his farther tried. 

"FUCK OFF" Tyle raged throwing over the table. 

"Please stop you're scaring me" his brother cried but Tyler didn't care, he punched a hole through the wall.

"YOU SHOULD BE SCARED OF ME" 

Tyler punched and kicked everything he could see; this isn't fair why was did it have to be him that gets declared insane, why can't he just be normal. 

The more the thoughts snowballed the angrier he got, jelly escorted his siblings out of the room and Chris locked the door. 

Tyler was yelling and screaming. 

Then he stopped. 

The sudden stop worried everyone more than the screaming. 

Chris carefully opened the door to see his 18 year old son sobbing on the floor. 

He sobbed and sobbed until he became uncouncious.

Zack picked him up, like he was a baby and carried him to the room they'd shared since Zack was born. 

\-----------

It was 4am and Tyler was awake and drowning in a sea of guilt. 

He got out of bed, his time had come, Tyler was done. 

His cheeks stained, and his bones heavy, he grabbed his rucksack and crept out his and Zacks room.

He snuck into his parents room and gently kissed their foreheads, Tyler felt so guilty looking at his mothers peaceful eyes that where laced with dark bags, he reminded himself that this was for the better and left.

He snuck down the hallway and into Maddy and Jays room,

"Don't end up like me" he whispered to his siblings, a fresh batch of tears slid down his face. 

He tip-toed into his own room, Tyler knew this was his hardest goodbye. Him and Zack had always been close. 

"I love you" he cried, holding in a sob.

Little did he know Zack was awake. 

Tyler clambered out of the window and slid down one of the pipes. 

Zack waited until he was certain Tyler wouldn't see him, and followed him. 

Zack was to far behind Tyler for comfort, but he couldn't risk being seen. 

He followed the trail that Tylers footprints led in the forest, wrapping his arms around his chest for warmth. 

He regonised the trail, but fuck knows where from. 

His instincts where telling him something was wrong. 

Really wrong. 

He started running, picking up speed every second, nearly skidding at every turn.

The trail came to a hault. 

Zack saw the huge treehouse. 

Zack saw 3 empty packets of paracetamol next to his brothers rucksack.

Zack saw his brother lying on the floor next to the tree he jumped from.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the shite spelling.


	4. Josh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading frens, love you all |-/
> 
> Also can we just take a second to appreciate the wdbwontv vid that the boys realised? Fuckin glorious.

Two paramedics arrived, they immediately lifted Josh out of the tub and and ran a small selection of tests on him. 

His heart was beating, but it was getting weaker by the second. 

Ashley and Jordan cried hysterically hugging into each over.

"Buddy" the paramedic called, but Josh still didn't respond. 

They transferred him to the ambulance, wrapping up the wounds on his arms. 

"Stitches?" A young paramedic asked his colleague,

"Definatly" 

"Right, one of you can come in the ambulance but it's vital you stay calm" 

Ashley gently nudged her brother forward knowing that he was in a better state of mind. 

Jordan joined his brother and they set off.

Jordan turned to his brother, his face was lifeless. 

The ambulance stopped. 

"WHAT THE FUCK?" Yelled Jordan,

"Listen son, another ambulance with a lad very similar to your brother has broken down; I know this isn't legal and me and my colleague could get sacked, but if we don't help this boy will die"

The ambulance door opened and a boy about Josh's age was hauled in, they put him down on the ambulance floor,

"Quick get in" an older man said, he must be the broken-down ambulance paramedic, and a boy the same age of Jordan sat in the seat next to him. 

There was a boy with a tube down his throat and a huge gnash on his head, a boy who was slowly slipping away, two hysterical 16 year old boys, two paramedics working on the casualtys and one driving. 

Jordan tried to catch his breath, then he noticed the boy on the floor opening his eyes.

"TYLER" 

But then his eyes clamped shut and alarms were going off. 

"HES GONE INTO CARDIC ARREST" yelled the paramedic, and the one that was helping Josh kneeled to the floor to help out.

 

*Tyler tried to sit up but a he was in a box, he fumbled around and found a lock, he tried to pick at it but a little light revealed where his nails had all ready lost their battle with the lock. So he pushed the box some more, and suddenly he found the breath he was searching for*

"We've got a pulse!" Everyone sighed in relief, except from Josh and Tyler of course, and Jordan hugged the stranger sat next to him who was crying in relief.

How fucking far away was this goddamn hospital. 

Jordan clasped onto his brothers hand,

"Am I alive and well or am I dreaming dead" 

"Josh" 

"Josh"

Josh threw up, and fell back unconscious again, but it gave everyone a little bit of hope. 

"We're driving towards the morning son, where all your blood will be washed away and all you did will be undone" the older paramedic said, with a spark in his eye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notice all the taxi cab references? ;)


	5. Tyler.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope this medically accurate.

The ambulance was greeted by two teams of doctors and nurses.

Tyler was lifted of the floor and placed on a bed and Josh was wheeled out. 

Zack gave Jordan a quick hug and followed his brother.

"This is Tyler Joseph, 18 years old, has taken 38 paracetamol pills, has jumped from a tall hight"

Zack watched as a few doctors winced. 

"Cadiac arrested in the ambulance, possible brain damage, I'm surprised the blood loss didn't kill him" continued the paramedic.

Zack stood back and watched as the doctors and nurses worked on his brother, he felt silent tears trickling down his face, 

"Hello lovely, are you alright" an older nurse asked.

Zack nodded, refusing to take his eyes of his brother.

"No you're not, how old are you?" 

"16" 

"Oh son, you need to call your Mother and your Father, come with me" the nurse said softly, 

"No"

"Come on sweetheart"

Zack gave in and followed the nurse, she lead him to the the nurses desk. 

"Call your parents son" 

Zack hesitated, he knew this was going to be the most difficult phone call he'd ever have to make, how the fuck do you tell your Mum that your brother is knocking at deaths door? 

"I'll give you some time" the nurse gave him a sympathetic smile and walked off.

Zack looked up and around; how on earth did he end up here? In a busy ER department? Fuck.

He looked at the phone again, and typed in his mothers number.

She picked up instantly.

"Hello" she shouted down the line, Zack could hear the panic in her voice 

"Mom"

"WHERR THE FUCK ARE YOU AND TYLER OH MY GOD ZACK ARE YOU OKAY? IS TYLER OKAY? WHAT THE HE-" 

"Mom" Zack cut her off, crying again. 

"Where are you" she sad, much more calmly.

"Hospital" he sputtered

"SHIT, I'm on my way" 

The tone of her voice sent shivers down his spine.

He walks back to Tyler's bed and saw a huge bandage wrapped around his head, a few other tangly bits of equipment dotted over his body and a huge drip going out of his hand.

"Oh Tyler, what have you done" he mumbled. 

"I see you've called your parents, would ya like me to explain what will happen know" said a younger nurse, "the lady you were talking to earlier, Ruby, has completed her shift so you'll have to put up with me" she smiled. 

"Uh yes, sorry, uh what's going to happen"

"Well the cuts on Tyler's arm"

"Wait what" Zack interrupted, 

"Oh, Tyler has a lot of what looks like self-inflicted cuts in his arm" she paused "and thighs, they are all to old to stitch so we will sterry strip them up okay?"

Zack nodded. 

"We think he might of broke his wrist to, and we need to check for any skull of spinal fractures, through when he wakes up he will be able to tell us if there's any pain, we are also going to scan him for brain injury and we'all stitch his head" 

Zack took in a deep breath. 

"Tyler's paracetamol levels are dangerously high so once he comes around, which hopefully will be in 10 or so minutes we'll start him on the first of three drips; they'll make him very sick but he'll gradually get better"

Zack felt tears rolling down his face.

"What's your name?" The nurse asked.

"Zack"

"Zack" she repeated "Zack you saved your brothers life today, I can guarantee that without you he'd be dead, and I can't make any promises but I think Tyler will be physically fine in a few weeks at most. If you need any help ask for a member of staff for Tatum and I'll be here in a dash"

"Thanks"

"No problems at all"

Tatum walked off and Zack was left alone with his brother.

"Zack" Tyler mumbled, 

Zack sobbed into Tyler's chest, 

"I thought you were dead" he sputtered.

"Hey I'm still alive" Tyler said weakly, "I shouldn't be though"

"Don't you dare say that" Zack said softly, wiping the tears Tyler hadn't realised he made. 

Tatum came back,

"Hello sleepy head" she smiled, noticing how tense Tyler became at her presence, despite his week state, "It's time for your scan"

Tyler nodded gently.

"I think you're moms at reception Zack" she said, wheeling Tyler out of the room, I'll get David to guide the both of you to the relatives room. Zack nodded, he heard screaming coming from the bed next to where Tyler's was, "What the heck?" He wondered to reception where he saw his mum next to a guy who must be David.


	6. Josh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In amongst the sea of anxiety disorders that control my life, health anxiety (a form of OCD) seems determined to torment me for every second I'm awake so I was wondering if anyone can suggest any coping methods? I keep trying to distract myself but I'm failing miserably atm, thank you all for sticking about btw, I hope you all see a cute dog today |-/

Jordan watched as the over boy, who he come to know as Tyler and his brother left with a team of medical staff, this left him and Josh with another team of medical staff. 

The transferred the boy out of the ambulance before a doctor wrapped another bandage on Joshs arm, the blood still soaked threw. 

"Okay so this is Joshua William Dun, he was found soaked in a mixture of his own blood and vomit, he has taken a serious paracetamol overdose and has lost a dangerous amount of blood; he is at major risk of going into shock from bloodloss but I suspect he has thrown most of the pills he took up" yelled the paramedic.

"Is blood loss the reason he is currently unconscious?" Asked a student nurse.

"I suspect so"

The doctors and nurses repeatedly shouted orders at each other but for Jordan it was a blur,

"Where r u?" He text his sister,

"On a bus, will be there in 10"

Jordan practically gasped when a doctor walked in with a bag of blood,

"Isn't that for really really really sick people?" Jordan asked, panic rising.

"You're brother lost a lot off blood" is all the doctor replied with.

Jordan was speechless. 

"Aye could ya please help meh wake up yah brother lad" a man with a heavy Scottish accent asked,

"Sure" he replied, snapping back in to reality. 

"Oi, Jishwa" Jordan said, lightly slapping his brother, "oi, spooky jim"

Joshs eyes opened slowly, he saw a bag of blood flowing into one wrist, he took a deep breath, but then he saw a needle poised, and ready to enter his free wrist. 

Oh hell no. 

"GET THAT FUCKING THING AWAY FROM ME" he backed away, and started tugging at all the equipment wrapped around him, 

"Joshua I need you to calm do-"

"FUCK OFF" he yelled, ripping the canula out of his arm. 

Nurses ushered his shocked brother out of the room. 

"DONT YOU DARE FUCKING TOUCH ME YOU FUCKTARD" he screamed.

"Josh, you need to understand that you are under a 24 hour section meaning that you have to under go whatever treatment we say you need"

"IF YOU REALLY GAVE A SHIT ABOUT ME, YOU'D LET ME DIE"

"Right that's it, we need to tranquilize him" one doctor said to another out side Josh stall, not realising Jordan was listening to every word he said,

"No wait, I'll calm him" he interrupted, 

The doctor shoot him an uncertain look. 

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." Jordan tried to say confidently, but he knew he failed miserably. 

The doctor sighed,

"Go for it" he opened the curtain.

"YOU" Josh spat, 

Jordan held his hands,

"Listen to me, if you don't calm down they'll stab a needle in your ass and you and I both no that you don't want that okay?" Jordan walked towards his brother. 

The anger turned to despair. 

"Why did you save me?" Josh asked, the desperation in the boys voice broke Jordan's heart, maybe he should of let him go. 

Jordan shook his head, he can't think like that. 

"Because you are my big brother, I need you now more than ever" Jordan noticed how the nurses took advantage of Josh being so engrossed in Jordan's words, and gently forced his legs away from his chest and lightly held both of his wrists.   
There was blood everywhere from Joshs outburst, his arms were still bleading. 

The doctors reconnect the blood to his right hand and put a cannula In his left wrist, they hooked him up to a drip and left the brothers alone for a small while. 

"Hey boys" said Ashley softly, as a nurse led her in.

"Hey" said josh with melancholic tone to his voice. 

Jordan gave Ashley a quick hug. 

"How are you feeling?" She asked Josh, in an agonisingly fake cheery voice,

"About as good as you can get for someone that wants to be dead" he mumbled. 

"Aye there, lads and lass,'ow are we doin'" the Scottish nurse asked, with a shittload of equipment in his hands. 

Their grim faces explained the whole situation. 

"Okie, so I'm 'ere to give you a load of stitches and explain what happens next" 

The three siblings nodded. 

Josh watched intently as the nurse did his job,

"'ave one of you called ya mam"

Josh looked at Jordan who looked at Ashley. 

"Fuck" they all whispered at once.

"All done 'ere" the Scottish guy said, securely wrapping Joshs arm up.

"So you'll be given 2 more drips after dis one okie? They'll all make ya pretty darn sick, we'all give ya some stuff for dat but y'ull still be sick" 

Josh sighed. 

"Why couldn't you just let me die" josh started to cry. 

"Hey, hey, hey" his brother cooed, Jordan perked himself on Joshs bed and pulled the boy into his chest "it's going to be okay" 

"Jordan I don't feel so-" 

Josh threw up, on the blankets. 

The Scottish nurse gave him a sick bowl in exchange for the sicky blankets, 

"I'll stay here if you promise not to be sick on me" Jordan smiled. 

"Of course" Said Josh, throwing up some more.

"I'm going to call Mum" said Ashley, leaving the stall.

Jordan looked at his older brother, "things will be okay one day Josh, trust me"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also feel free to follow me on Instagram (@smolbeansdunshine) shameless bit of self-promo


	7. Tyler.

Tyler had been in hospital for 2 days now, it had been 2 days of absolute hell. 

Doctors declared the fact that he hadn't suffered a major brain injury a miracle and Tyler was coming to the end of the third (and final) horrific drip that had caused two days of non-stop vomiting.

Tyler will never forget the look in his mothers eyes when he saw her for the first time so he denied her access, only his siblings could visit him. 

"So medically, you'll be fit to go by tomorrow, but we have to call the psych team for an assessment" The doctor who worked on the ward said to him "also, there has been a major accident, so we'll need to move you, that means you won't have your own room" 

"There's going to be loads of people?" Tylet panicked, 

"In normal circumstances, yes, but we don't think a 6 bed room would really compliment your mental state so there will be one other person who we are also transferring from this unit okay?"

"Umm yeh I guess" Tyler murmured, wanting to bang his head against the wall. 

"Tyler we also heard you talking to yourself last night, you said some pretty concerning things, so this is Bradley, he'll be your 1-2-1, providing everything goes well, you and the other patient will be on 1-2-2 okay?"

Tyler nodded,

"Call me brad" the guy whispered into his ear. 

"Im not sure if I'll get a chance to see you again Tyler, your new doctor is lovely though, but Tyler please stay alive"

Tyler nodded again, he didn't really have choice really. 

"I need the toilet" Tyler mumbled to himself as the doctor left the room. 

He lifted himself weakly off the best, throwing up for two days straight took a toll on his body. 

"No so fast buddy" said Brad following behind him,

"The fuck do you're doing?"

"Gotta follow you everywhere pal"

"Yeah and I need the damn toilet"

"It's okay, I'm used to it" said Brad trying to be comforting

"What do you think I'm gonna do? Kill myself with a toilet seat?"

Suddenly there was screaming down the hallway 

"IF I WANT TO GO TO THE FUCKING TOILET ON MY OWN I WILL" 

A similar argument was happening down the hallway 

"What a coincidence" Tyler mumbled. 

Him in Brad watched from out of view, Brad making sure the situation was under control and that the skinny nurses didn't need the rugby player-sized mans help. 

"PLEASE LET ME FUCKING DIE" the boy screamed as 4 nurses held the boy down "YOU SHOULD OF LET ME DIE" 

Tyler's heart broke, he felt exactly the same. 

"He has borderline personality disorder, one of the symptoms is intense mood episodes" Brad paused "I just broke some serious confidentiality policy, I trust you not to repeat a word of what a said to another soul"

Tyler nodded, the boy started started bashing his head against the floor. 

Brad ran over and pointed a younger, female nurse over to Tyler.

"Brad quickly told me you need the loe, I understand you don't want me in so this is the deal, I'll give you two minutes, if you take any longer than that I'll bust in like the FBI and you must let me check your thighs okay?" 

Tyler was beyond greatful.

He considered killing himself but he knew he'd fail, which would cause a big, unnecessary drama. 

He sighed and washed his hands.

"I'm going to be your 1-2-1 for a while" 

Tyler didn't mind her, but he just felt defeated.

He silently sobbed into his pillow as soon as he got back to his room, he stayed there, literally not moving at all. 

An hour turned to two and two turned to three. 

"Where moving you now buddy"

Tyler felt the wheels on his bed roll against the floor, they went in a lift a rolled about some more. 

The bed grinded to hault, Tyler waited until the pattering of the doctors feeted faded. 

He turned onto his back, stomach and face facing the air and he sat up, the drip bleeped, meaning his drip was over and the 1-2-1 nurse quickly disconnected him.

Tyler look across the room to see a brad sat next a boy with dark wavy, brown hair stuck to his face and dark coffee eyes, his knees were pulled up to his chest "meet you're roommate, his name is Josh"


	8. Josh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've just realised how slow moving this is, thank you for sticking around anyway

Josh felt weird, he had never had to sleep anymore than one person in the room and that was from his previous suicide attempts.

He stared up, counting the small cracks in the ceiling. Hopefully tonight was going to be his last night in hospital, which he was beyond relieved about, he was going to kill himself as soon as he got out of this dump.

He looked over to his side to see his 1-2-1 had feel asleep so he tip-toed out of his bed and to the window. He wanted to jump; but the windows were suicide proof.  
Fuck.  
Josh looked up to the sky, admiring the stars that shined against the dark.  
"Did you know that we all have a bit of star in us" said a voice that made Josh jump out of his skin, Josh turned around to see a boy with a bandage around his head, big brown eyes and baby pink lips.  
"N-n-no I didn't" Josh could feel his anxiety rising,  
"Shut up" the boy said suddenly, turning to his side, "sorry that's blurry, I'm Tyler by the way"  
Josh nodded slowly, what the fuck was blurry?  
"Yes I know blurry, but the windows don't open, see?"  
Josh stood awkwardly as the boy spoke to himself.  
"U-u-um m-my m-mom bought in a f-few films, if you'd like to watch one with me, d-down in the p-play room"  
"Won't their be people in there? Also I thought it was a teen lounge?"  
"Teen l-l-lounge my ass"  
Tyler smiled, okay then.  
Josh went back to his bed and picked up a bunch of DVDs and a key,  
"How on earth?" Tyler gasped pointing to the key,  
"I g-g-genuinely have no idea, i found this in my draw after a disassociative episode" Josh tensed, he was sweating and anxious, Tyler was still talking himself but Josh chose ignore it.  
The boys snuck down the corridor and into the play room,  
"Don't turn the light on" Josh said as he turned on a sensory cart that gave of a glow of light, he shook a few glow-in-the-dark teddy bears and turned on the TV.  
Josh grabbed his secret blade and wrapped, wrapped it up in some tissue paper the children did arts and crafts with and used tape to secure it to the side off his under pants.  
"Fight club" Tyler replied with, pretending he didn't see Joshs actions.  
"My favourite" Josh grinned.  
the boys sat down on the uncomfortable, plastic sofas and enjoyed the movie.

"It's 4am" said Josh, Tyler was 50% asleep.  
"Come on sleepy head, let's get you to bed" he put Tyler's arm over his shoulder and guided him back to bed, dodging nurses of course.  
Tyler flopped on his bed, Josh cringed at the sound Tyler's almighty flop made thinking it would wake his new friends 1-2-1 up, thankfully she was a heavy sleeper.  
Josh made his way to the bathroom and sat on the floor, he made more slits on his arm, he was careful not to hit fat but still went deep in enough to bring up a completely white layer, he sighed, hating how good it felt.  
He hated himself.  
He sat completely idle until the blood dried walked back down to the play room, he hid his blades in the usual place and turned off the tv, making sure there was no evidence of his and Tyler's mini-adventure.  
He checked his phone,  
"7:30" he gasped, he walked back into the bedroom and was even more shocked to see his 1-2-1 was still asleep.  
"That's got be a record" he thought to himself, plonking himself on his bed.  
He didn't move, he felt like his body was pinned to the bed. His head had paralysed him. After not moving a muscle for at least 2 hours, Josh managed to bring himself to quickly go to the toilet before his 1-2-1 woke up, he quickly jumped back onto his bed before anyone could notice his disappearance. He layed down for another half hour, brain refusing to give in to his eyes desire for sleep, he heard footsteps but kept his eyes fixated on the ceiling, "Bradley, you feel asleep" Josh guessed it was either Tyler's 1-2-1 or a nurse waking his 1-2-1. "Thanks, Sue" "No problems he's been awake for a while by the way" she whispered, and walked off. "Alright Josh, did you sleep well?" Josh say up slightly and shrugged his shoulders, "Did you sleep at all?" Josh turned his head away, "Yes" "You're a terrible liar Josh" Just sighed, he didn't have the will to deal with Brad today, heck he didn't have the will to live. "You have your psych assessment today" Josh dramatically threw himself back into the lying position.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also I apologise for taking 2 days to update this, I was working on another fic which has been completed and published, so this fic is my number one priority


	9. Tyler.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorryyyyyy for not updating, my phone charger broke so I went and got a shit one from poundland but the fucking end bit thing snapped and got stuck in my phone :/ anyway I've got a half-decent one do I'm all set to update :)

Tyler sat on his bed, legs crossed like a pretzel, he's not to sure how he got here from the playroom couch but he doesn't really care; he has bigger problems, like his psych assement that he's about to undergo after his new friend Josh has his.

Tyler looks up to see a middle aged women with mid-length straight ginger hair and circular glasses approach Josh  
and pull a light blue curtain around Josh's bed, for some reason this made Tyler's anxiety spike.  
He could feel his heart smacking against the walls of his chest, his stomach feels like a washing maschine; he realised that soon he'd have to tell this woman everything about his life.  
Tyler couldn't handle this.  
"You okay kid?" His 1-2-1 asked, noticing how agitated Tyler was getting,  
"Yes" Tyler mumbled, but his voice cracked, the world around him was spinning, he ran to the toilets and threw up the contents of his stomach.  
He slumped against the wall next to the toilet and fell to the floor, literally gasping for breath  
"Tyler, I need you to take deep breathes for me" said his 1-2-1,  
"FUCK OFF" Tyler yelled, between gasps.  
"Is going to be okay Tyler"  
Tyler began to sob, he could hear blurrys voice telling him he's pathetic and worthless.  
"Come on Ty" His 1-2-1 helps him up while he continues to sob, and guides him back to bed. 

Tyler pulled the quilt over his body, he was beginning to feel a tad bit more relaxed but he was still nervous.  
"NO NO NO NO NO PLEASE NO"  
Tyler looks up to see Josh tearing down the curtain and backing away from the lady he saw earlier with tears streaming down his cheeks,  
"Joshua please ca-"  
"NO YOU CANT DO THIS" his voice turned from anger to desperation  
"It's going to be al-"  
"You can't make me" he sobbed, his face was bright red.  
"I'm sorry Joshua, I really am, but this is for your benefit"  
Josh cried, and cried, and cried on the floor, Tyler thought he was going to pass out.  
The lady sighed and turned around towards Tyler; Tyler's heart stopped.  
Oh no.  
She pulled over his curtain.  
Oh no.  
"You must be Tyler Robert Joseph"  
Tyler nodded.  
"I see your here after you made an incredibly serious attempt to take you're life" she said very slowly.  
Tyler nodded again, fiddling the bandage around his head with his left hand and gripping his bed sheets with his right hand.  
"Okay, so I'm going to ask you a few different questions and I would like you to answer ever single one of them with 100% honesty, alright?"  
Tyler nodded again, already holding back tears, he could tell that this wasn't going to go well at all.  
"Have you ever tried to kill yourself before?"  
Memories of falling to the ground alongside a makeshift noose made of jeans and the many nights he spent pukeing pills came flooding back, and with that Tyler lost it.  
Tears poured down his face as he admitted everything.  
After what felt the eternity in hell, and a shit load of crying, the lady had come to a conclusion.  
"Tyler, you have a choice you can either go to hospital as a voluntary patient or we will section you have under the mental health act; you are to high risk to go home"  
Tyler ran.  
He navigated his way through what felt like a jungle, two nurses saw him running and grabbed his arms.  
"GET OFF ME" He screamed, but the nurses grip was strong.  
Tyler saw the psychiatrist, Brad, and another large bloke come closer to him; he screamed louder when he saw the needle in the psychiatrists hand.  
The nurses released their grip on Tyler's arms as Brad and the over bloke took over, the two men took an arm each and pushed Tyler onto his knees then onto his stomach, holding his legs down with their legs. Tyler wouldn't give up, and started banging his head against the floor,  
"Calm down now" Brad particularly ordered, but Tyler still give up.  
Brad gave the psychiatrist a desperate look,  
"He's not going to calm Julie"  
Tyler took advantage of Brads week second and released the left side of his body.  
"Oh no you don't buddy"  
Brad pulled him back down again.  
"Tyler what on ear-"  
The sound of his Moms voice made him more determined to run, how the fuck did she get here anyway? Tyler could feel tears roll down his face, he didn't know why he was crying, he wasn't sad he was angry, how dare a stranger tell him he needs to be locked up.  
He carried on fighting.  
The psychiatric sighed, ordering one nurse to take Tylers Mom out of the situation.  
Tyler screamed some more, he had nothing left to lose, apart from the little bit of dignity he had left.  
The psychiatrist knelt down beside Tyler whilst Brad and the other bloke held him in his place, Tyler felt someone pull down his pants and underwear and the sharp sting of a needle.

All he could hear was blurry laughing. 

Everything went black


	10. Josh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so fucking sorry omg, I haven't been doing brilliantly recently. Also I'm sorry about the grammar and spelling; I wanted to get this up asap so I haven't spell checked it <3

Josh cowered in the corner as his 1-2-1 tried to calm down him down. 

His lungs burned as cried.

"Y-YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME" he screamed 

"Josh this is for your-"

"SHUT UP"

"What's going on?" Asked a panicked middle-aged women

"MOM" Josh cried, he ran over to her and collapsed into her arms

"T-they are g-going to l-lock me up" Josh sobbed 

"I'm sure they're not" His brother tried to reassure from behind his Mom.

Joshs 1-2-1 came up to the small bundle with a sympathetic look upon her face.

"Josh has been sectioned" she said, fiddling fiddling with her glasses.

"What!?" Said Jordan and his mom in unison.

"T-t-they are locking me up" Josh cried some more

The three of them fell into a group hug crying on the floor

"I BOUGHT GIFTS" yelled Ashley, busting through the door. 

She looked at the bundle off people crying on the floor and the 1-2-1 standing awkwardly in the corner

"Oh" is all she could say, gripping onto a helium balloon and a over-sized teddy bear. 

Jordan pulled out of the hug and softly pulled Ashley out off the room. 

He tries to speak to her but they are interrupted by screaming, they look down the corridor to see a young man being held down by to large men whilst a psychologist looks on holding a huge needle.   
They watch on as a middle aged women walks in who is almost as hysterical as her son, another boy stands a few meters back, the screaming intensity sand more nurses run to help. Ashley and Jordon forced themselves to turn away as soon as they see the boys pants being pulled down. 

Once again the ward is silence.

"Josh has been sectioned" Jordan whispered to his sister and they walk back into the room. 

"I need 5 minutes" their mom cried rushing out of the room. 

The sibling look over to their brother who was still intensely crying, now on his bed. 

Ashley perks herself on his bed, and rubs the top of his back.

The door opens and they see the boy who melting down in the arms of a large man who gently tested him on his bed alongside the same woman and another boy. 

"No way" said the boy, pointing at Jordan.

Jordan studied the boys face. 

Then he realised

"Oh my god" gasped Jordan. 

The boys pulled each other into a tight embrace, words couldn't describe the feeling they felt. 

"He looks so much better" said Jordan, the last time he'd seen him Tyler had a tube down his throat. 

Zack looked over at Jordan's brother,

"Is he alright?"

"Not really, he's been sectioned. What's up with Tyler" 

"Dude no way Tyler's also been sectioned" 

The boys hugged again, the couldn't quite believe it. 

When they told there families, nobody could.


	11. Tyler.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone still reads this I fucking love you, thank you so much. The spelling and grammar is probably appalling, so I apologise in advance

Tyler woke up in a completely unfamiliar place. 

His bones felt heavy, holding him hostage to his bed. 

The smell; it was different, not quite the hospital smell but a more hand-sanitizer kind of smell.

Tyler felt weak, confused and incredibly scared. 

He propped himself up, resting on his arms.

"Oh Tyler, you're awake!" Cheered a painfully fake enthustiastic nurse who was sat in the corner. 

Then it hit him. 

Images of his Mom crying, being pinned to the floor, needles flooded his brain

He let himself flop back against the plastic-coated mattress. 

"Oh no you don't" the nurse smiled, leaning over the boy "you were allowed one big nap but no more until bedtime" 

Tyler wanted to punch the patronising bitch.

"Welcome to Blue-Blackwood unit!, you have to put up with me for a few more hours after your famous outburst at the hossy-hos-hospitalllll" she said, crossing her arms 'like a gangster' at the end

Tyler cringed. 

He wanted to cry. 

He wanted to die. 

\-----------------

Despite the nurses orders Tyler fell back asleep; he couldn't help it and he was honestly relieved to escape the deserts of his mind for a few hours. 

Tyler woke up feeling groggy and weak, but a bit better than earlier, he grinned when he realised he didn't have a 1-2-1 or nurse. 

He slipped out of bed and used the toilet that was attached to his room, it felt so good not having to negotiate with a nurse for independence. 

He wondered towards his door a tested the handle, presuming it would be locked, to his surprise the door slid straight open.

"Wow" he mumbled, walking down a a corridor with 30 doors, all of which must be bedrooms. 

He walked to the end of the corridor and stood by the thick wooden door for a minute observing the site. 

He noticed holes in the walls between doors from where people have kicked and punched, he noticed numbers on the doors; his being 250, he also noticed a shadow with red eyes near his door, this usually ment blurry was angry and Tyler was in for torture later on.

He pushed passed the wooden door into another corridor, this one was much wider and much brighter. 

He peeked into one room, it was quite small and looked like an office; there was two staff members typing away. 

"HEY NEWCOMER" A painfully thin, tall boy yelled.

Tyler jumped.

"Shit, did I make you jump? Sorry I'm a bit loud and a bit fucked in the head. Damn I said to much again" the boy sputtered out, unable to stay still.

"It's okay" Tyler said softly

"My name is Brendon, would you like me to give you a quick tour?"

"Errrr yes please, I'm Tyler by the way"

"So this is the "baby" staff room, they only use that one for incredibly important and personal things" 

Tyler was jogging to keep up with Brendon

"Altogether their are 300 people here, 50 are on a summer-camp style stay where they are taught basic copeing methods; they are on the bottom floor. Then we have 50 people on the second floor who are low risk and low secruity. The 3rd and 4th floor has 100 people who are medium secure and then there is us. They call us the acute section, we are all seriously ill, every single one of us want to die" Brendon explained as they walked threw the corridors. 

Tyler took in all the information. 

Brendon busted open a pair of wooden door and the sudden burst of everyday chatter was overwhelming, but manageable.

There were a huge range of patients, from 14-19, most of which had serverly scared arms, Tyler realised that his own arms were exposed but he didn't mind. Nobody stared at him, laughed at him or judged him. 

"Come sit with my friends" said Brendon pointing to the table in the corner. 

Tyler followed him, and perched himself on a stool.

"We have a newcomer, meet Tyler" 

The group smiled at him.

"You know the routine guys" said a girl with short brown hair "name, pronouns, sexuality, diagnoses"

"My name is crybaby" said a girls with Split hair colours and a baby-ish accent

"Disassociative personality disorder, her real name is Mel" Brendon whispered in to Tyler's ear

"My name is dallon, I'm pretty depressed with psychotic tendencies" Tyler saw marks on Dallons arms similar to his own "I use he/him prounouns and I'm gay"

"WITH ME" Brendon added

"My Names is Halsey, I use she/her pronouns and I'm bisexual, I have bipolar"

"My names Matty, and I tried to kill myself" said a boy with medium-length curly hair

"My names George and I did the same as him" he gestured to Matty

Tyler noticed how the two boys avoided talking about their sexuality, but he wasn't one to pry.

"I'm Pete, I'm gay, please use he/him and I have CPTSD, and this is Patrick, he has selective mutism and depression"

"My Name is Philip and I have borderline personality disorder and EDNOS, I use he/him and I'm bi

"My names Dan and I'm anorexic and I'm gayyyyyyyy"

"Brendon, gay, also anorexic with bulimia"

"Is that Josh?" Halsey asked "From that old group therapy we went to?"

"Oh my god it is!" Said Brendon, getting up suddenly

"Careful Bren, he looks pretty anxious"

Tyler realised that this was the same person from the hospital, he also realised Josh had witnessed his meltdown. 

The Patrick cautiously walked over to Josh and gently grabbed his hand guiding him to the table. 

The group knew that it would be better to carry on the conversation not wanting to trigger Joshs anxiety any further. 

"So tell us about you of your comfortable Tyler" said Halsey

"My names Tyler, I have psychosis and depression, I'm gay and I'm he/him"

"Well Tyler, it looks like you might be one of us"


	12. Josh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry I haven't updated this, I've been in a really bad state of my mind, love you all x

Josh felt weird. 

He was sat around all of the people who were his friends before he completely isolated himself off from humanity. 

These people accepted him, they never saw him as an outsider because of his illness, mainly because they all met at a group therapy session for mentally ill young people. 

Josh scanned their faces, every single one of them had changed. 

He saw Tyler.

What a coincidence.

Josh stayed quiet as the group chatted away, his doubts were creeping into his brain, he was convinced they hated him for cutting them off. 

"So Josh, how are you?" said Dan, catching Josh's attention

Josh fiddled with his hands

"I'm okay" he said, quietly. 

"Joshy is lielie" Mel said in her alters baby voice

"I'm alright, I promise" he said, trying to sound confident but the wobble in his voice proved otherwise. 

"Liar" Brendon squeaked as Pete kicked him under the table.

The table was awkwardly silent for a few seconds. 

"Anyone want a cig?" Matty asked balancing on between his fingers whilst searching his pockets for a lighter

"Me" Yelled Brendon, grabbing the attention of nearby tables 

"No fuckin way mate, you owe me 30 quid from all the ones you've taken"

"What's a quid"

Dan, Phil, George and Matty rolled their eyes simultaneously

"Are those even allowed?" Asked Tyler, scratching his head

"Nope" Said Pete as Matty passed him one

Matty gave one to everyone at the table,

"Staff check on us every 30 minutes, you new guys probably didn't notice but Haley just checked on us a minute ago, we have like 28 minutes to do pretty much whatever we like" George explained 

"We had more supervision on low secure" added Phil

"But we still have to slip under the table because some fucker might snitch on us" 

The group slid from their chairs and sat in a circle in the floor. 

The table clothe filtered the light making it moderately dark. 

Everyone just sat in silence

"I-is c-calories in these" asked Dan suddenly holding the cig as far away from him as he could 

"Of course not you div" said Pete in a jokey manor 

"Are you sure?"

"Positive" 

Josh observed his friends again. 

From a distance they looked like a normal distance they looked like a normal group of angsty teens but when you look closer you can see the small signs like the way Mel/crybaby sucks her thumb, or the way Halsey is slumped against the table leg without enough energy to pull herself up and the way Tyler gazed at his left, intensely watching thin air. And if you looked even closer you'd see the scars dotted around George's neck from the many times he's linguatured of tried to hang him self, the way Patrick's lips never moved,the rainbow of scars going along Matty and Dallons arms and thighs and the way Pete was ALWAYS looking around the corner, trying to make sure nobody hurts him. 

Alarms went of making everyone jump, Tyler and Josh being the most startled. 

"Somebody's kicking off, it's okay guys" Said Dallon softly

But Josh was already triggered.

He started rocking back and forward, tears steaming down his face, his whole body was tense. 

"Hey, it's oka-"

"IM GOING TO THROW UP" Josh interrupted , banging his against the table as he got up and ran out. 

Tyler went after him, everyone else slightly behind.

Josh ran out to the corridor and threw up, he lent against the wall and dropped to the floor, knees against chest.

"You're going to be okay" said Tyler softly. 

The group sat around him, and they all told stories in attempt to calm him down, Brendon told everyone about the many times he ran away from school, Mel (who was Mel again) told some funny disassociation story's, everyone had a good story to tell. 

For the first time in years Josh felt accepted.

He felt loved.

But feeling loved usually lead to unhealthy attachments with anyone and it always ended in tears.

But Josh is usually the only person crying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the grammar/spelling mistakes xx


	13. Tyler.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for not updating, please check out my other fic "he doesn't care anymore" it's about suicide and stuff and is probably really triggering but I worked really hard on it, anyway ily all <3 |-/

A nurse found the group sat in the corridor, she took a look at Josh and asked him if he needed any meds, Josh shook his head.

Tyler had only known these people for a few hours but he had never felt so accepted. 

For once he wasn't the most fucked up person in the room.

He looked over to Josh who seemed very spaced out.

"You okay bud" said Brendon to Josh.

Josh just looked at him.

Mel gently grabbed Josh's arm to check his bracelet.

"Oh he's in the room next to me" said Tyler

"Are you going to take him back to his room then?"

"Yeah okay" 

Josh had his knees firmly up to his chest.

"A-am I real?"

"Yes J, you are real" said Matty

"Josh what's your diagnosis again?, before you left group therapy you said you had depression and anxiety but it's been a few years, has anything changed?" Asked Phil

Josh looked at them.

"You can tell us anything bro" said Pete, Pat nodding by his side. 

"Borderline personality disorder, depression and a load of anxiety"

The whole group nodded in understanding. 

"Is that why you cut us off? So you wouldn't get attached?"

Josh nodded, rocking back and forth.

"You definitely are real Josh"

Josh kicked his shoes off so he could feel the floor,

"I'm going to take you to your room okay?" Said Tyler

"I'll come as well" Dan perked up, Phil helping him to his feet

"Meet us back in the day room Brendon called out as him and the rest of the group walked to the diner. 

They walked down a few silent corridors

Tyler jumped suddenly.

"Wow"

"What is it Tyler?"

"N-nothing"

But it wasn't nothing, he could hear blurryface and he was stood right in front of him.

"Kill yourself Tyler, do it right here while your so-called friends laugh at your dead, lifeless body" Blurry sneered

"Tyler what is it" said Dan who was a few meters away from his stone-frozen friend

"Kill yourself or I will kill you" 

Those were the words that made Tyler lose it. 

He started to smack his head against the wall in hopes that he would knock himself unconscious and silence his head, Blurrys workers surrounded him and Tyler was fucked, alarms went off and hospital staff grabbed his arms and legs and gently restrained him to the ground, they gave him 10 minutes to calm down but 10 minutes passed and Tyler was still hysterical, a nurse came out of one of the rooms with a needle and Josh and Dan forced themselves to turn around as Tyler was injected. 

Tyler's punches and kicks became far more week and he fell into a strong PRN induced sleep.  
Josh surprised himself and offered to carry Tyler back to his room, the nurses where incredibly grateful and made sure Tyler was secure in Josh arms.

Josh could feel the brunettes soft breath against his chest and he'd be lying if he said it didn't warm his heart.

Dan led Josh to Tyler's room and Josh gently placed Tyler onto his bed. He wiped a tear from Tyler's cheek and kissed him on the forehead.

"Sleep tight sweetheart"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is really crappy compared to the rest I'm so sorry


	14. Josh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I owe you guys an explanation; recently I've been in a really bad state of mind myself, I have even tried to kill myself, life has been such a bitch recently. But I'm back, and I will update more often, love you x

After yesterday's incident, Tyler was put on one-to-one and both boy's "settle down period was over meaning they HAD to attended therapy.

Josh sat next to his friends in a circle, leaving a chair for Tyler.

A few minutes had past and Josh was starting to get worried, sure he'd only known Tyler for about a week but they had formed an unspoken bond, despite not really speaking to eachover.

Tyler walked in and he looked terrible,

"Guess they've given him some strong shit" Matty remarked, noticing how dilated his pupils were and how spaced out he looked.

"I know he banged his head hard but what the fuck? It wasn't hard enough to do that to his forehead" said Dan at the sight of a huge cut going down the middle of his forehead

"How did he hurty his eye" asked crybaby, Mels alter

"I don't know Mel, maybe it's from hitting his head against the wall, just a thought" replied Pete sarcastically

She huffed, "it's crybaby"

Pete just rolled his eyes

 

"stop being rude guys" said Phil

Josh beckoned Tyler to sit next to him, the nurse that had been watching him spoke to a member of staff and left the room.

"Can I have you're attention angels" 

Everyone rolled their eyes at her painfully fake enthusiasm

"So I see we have some new faces"

Josh's knew what was going to happen

"Would you boys like to introduce yourself"

Josh was panicking 

"You first" she pointed directly at him

Josh needed to escape, his chest was on fire and he couldn't breathe.

He ran to the door, kicked it down triggering a fuck load of alarms and raced to the toilets.

He fell against the cubicle wall and curled into himself

"Open up buddy or I'm coming in"

Josh couldn't move.

A nurse opened the door from the outside and kneeled down next to the hysterical boy. 

"Take these" he said, handing some pills to the boy

"No" Josh spluttered between gasps for air

"Fair enough, but try these exercises with me, okay?"

The nurse demonstrated some breathing exerersises and Josh tried to copy him 

"You're doing great buddy"

Josh calmed a bit.

The nurse told him some stories about some of funniest and embarrassing stories he'd every witnessed/experienced. 

Josh always found people talking to him so comforting

Fuck knows why.

"My names Kenneth by the way but call me Kenny, if you ever need me ask for me, right?"

"Okie"

"See you around buddy"

**Author's Note:**

> i spent an unhealthy amount of time on this lmao, tell me if you like it though x


End file.
